A careful examination revealed that one of the carp ifaces on one system
had ip addrs that were missing on the other.
Carefully compare ifconfig -aA on each machine to each other.
I now slavishly alsoensure that the addrs occur in the same order ... I
am sure that has no effect, but there it is.
Are you allowing the carp traffic in and out?
Does a tcpdump show the expected traffic?.